The stories you are about to read are possibly true. But probably not.
One day a Sports Nut writer was sitting at training camp watching the day go by as the special teams prepared to run down the field really fast and fake hit somebody. These things he observed may or may not have happened.
Michael Vick took a momentarily break from trying to sell Michael Vick clothing, Michael Vick endorsed muscle milk and the Michael Vick workout to do what he’s paid the big bucks for. Selling the Michael Vick book. When Andy Reid declined to buy a Vick book because it didn’t come with an extra helping of French fries, Vick reminds Andy that President Obama wants him to slide. A confused Reid buys a book.
Jason Babin is seen stalking the ever elusive South Street Grizzly Bear. Trent Cole apparently saw one behind the equipment shed at Lehigh. Babin is heard to grumble something about the snipe that keep scaring it away.
Fletcher Cox keeps trying to get Howard Mudd to quit spelling is name with two Cs and a K.
Dion Lewis, tired of having to make the coeds leave his dorm room every morning, looks for an alarm to pull. This tip was passed on by Howard Mudd.
Long snapper Jon Dorenbos, completing his grueling 30 minute workout which consists entirely of seven snaps and a continual quarter behind the ear trick utterly confuses Jason Babin with the always popular “I got your nose”. Babin was last seen running around offering a reward for a new nose.
Michael Vick, in a passionate locker room speech, reminds everyone that President Obama wants him to slide. He follows this up by sliding, head first, through the shower and into Juan Castillo’s office, reminding Juan he has yet to purchase the new Michael Vick book. Castillo inquires if Vick knows who keeps writing “Juan loves Cox” all over his office.
Howard Mudd, after eying up the offensive line, calls a halt to practice so he can phone Sandra Bullock and demand she immediately adopt a few more black kids.
**credit many of these jokes to Howard Mudd Facts, the unofficial twitter account of not Howard Mudd.